Govinda! Feeling Your separation, I am considering a moment to be like twelve years or more. Tears are flowing from my eyes like torrents of rain, and I am feeling all vacant in the world in Your absence.

Sri Siksastakam Verse Seven
Reflections, by Sacinandana Swami

For a devotee of Krishna the world feels empty in the absence of his beloved Lord. In affairs of love, there is no substitute to the beloved—no other person, no technical devise, not even the fastest car can replace the whole object of one’s concentrated love.

Without Krishna, the world appears to the devotee like a play garden with meaningless toys, who hold no fascination for him—whatsoever. He only wants the real thing, that is Krishna.

Out of his intense desire tears come out of his eyes. There are different types of tears: hot tears, cool tears, tears shed out of anger or out of longing. But the tears of a devotee crying for his Lord are different. They have a special potency. They wash away all the remaining contaminations so that the eyes become very sharp for seeing Krishna always.

What are we to make out of this wonderful verse, which was composed and sung by Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu in the highest state of divine ecstasy? Are we forever to close our ears and hearts to the urgent message of this verse—thinking that I will never be on the level of consciousness, where such an exclusive longing takes place in my heart?

While it is of course not useful to imitate exalted states of Krishna consciousness, it is certainly very favourable if a devotee hankers for the day where he will enter the mood of blissful separation from Krishna.

In this world, when we feel separation, we feel only abject misery—we feel forsaken, forlorn and depressed.

But if the devotee can feel separation from the Lord, this separation will be the highest ecstasy. How so? Well, if you think of Krishna, Krishna is already there, because the thought of Him is identical with Him. There is no difference between thinking of Krishna and Krishna Himself. If we can only think of Krishna—intensely think of Krishna—then Krishna is with us. And separation is certainly an intense feeling.

Srila Rupa Gosvami took on one verse in his Padyavali verse collection, where a great devotee says:

“If I should choose between union with Krishna and separation from Him, I would choose separation, because when I am together with Krishna, I only see one Krishna, but if I am feeling real separation, then I see Krishna coming from every corner of the universe towards me.”

If while in this world we can actually wake up to the fact that we are now separated from Krishna—we will not be relaxed about it.

Especially in our practice of chanting Hare Krishna, a devotee of Lord Krishna will begin to feel that it is very necessary to be reconnected with the Lord. Already in the year 1969 Srila Prabhupada instructed the devotees to prayerfully cry for Krishna while chanting.

So we are addressing, Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna: “O the energy of the Lord, o the Lord, please accept me.” That’s all. “Please accept me.” We have no other prayer. “Please accept me.”

Lord Caitanya taught that we should simply cry, and we shall simply pray for accepting us. That’s all. So this vibration is simply a cry for addressing the Supreme Lord, requesting Him, “Please accept me. Please accept me.”

It is said that the best mood in which a devotee can perform bhajan while staying in this world is if he adopts the mood of separation. Srila Prabhupada once said: “Actually, meeting Krishna is possible through the attitude of separation taught by Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu. When the feeling of separation becomes very intense, one attains the stage of meeting Sri Krishna.” (CC Adi 4.108)

Many of the readers know how difficult it is to tell your mind what to think. Similarly it is very difficult to tell your emotions what to feel.

When we are unable to feel this mood of separation from Krishna and either think life is alright or just be disturbed about things which go wrong—in other words when our mind does not longingly call for Krishna we should feel concerned.

“What is wrong with me, that I cannot sincerely hanker for Sri Krishna, the source of all my life and happiness. Even a tree can feel thirst when there is no water and even an animal can feel distressed, when there is no food available. Isn’t God much more necessary than drink and food?”

But there is hope on the horizon: The realised words of the great acaryas [teachers] are like a stream of sweet spiritual water, which can refresh our tired heart so that feelings of devotion can come.

Let us happily listen to the words of Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakura in his song kabe ha’be bolo—which expresses spiritual requests.

1. Please tell me, when o when will that day be mine? My offences will come to an end and a taste for the pure Holy Name will be infused within my heart by the power of divine grace.

2. Feeling myself lower than a blade of grass, welcoming the quality of forbearance into my heart, giving honour to all living beings, and being freed from false pride, when will I taste the essence of the liquid nectar of the Holy Name?

3. Please tell me, when o when will that day be mine?
Wealth, followers, beautiful women as described in worldly poetry - I do not want any such bodily pleasures. O Lord Gaurahari! Please give me unmotivated devotion to Your lotus feet birth after birth.
Please tell me, when o when will that day be mine?

4. When, while articulating the divine Name of Sri Krishna, will my body be thrilled in ecstatic rapture, my words choking with emotions, loss of colour and ecstatic trembling occuring, and streams of tears flowing constantly from my eyes?
When, o when will that day be mine?

[...]

6. When will Lord Nityananda be merciful to me and release me from the illusion of the worldliness? When will He give me the shade of His own lotus feet and bestow upon me the qualification necessary to enter the market place of the Holy Name?
When oh when will that day be mine?

7. Somehow or other I shall buy or steal the mellows of the name of Lord Hari. Becoming thoroughly intoxicated by those liquid mellows, I will be stunned. By touching the feet of those great souls, who are expert in relishing those mellows, I will be constantly immersed in the sweet nectar of the Holy Name.
When, oh when will that day be mine?

8. When will there be an awakening in me of compassion for all fallen souls? When this Bhaktivinoda will forget his own happiness, and with a meek heart he will set out to propagate the glories of the Holy Name.

Once I met a devotee and told him of the hard state of my heart:

“I never feel any longings for Krishna, but instead I feel quite satisfied with the present state of affairs. What can you recommend me to do in order to enter into the world of spiritual feelings?”

The devotee gave me a surprising answer:

“If you can’t hanker for Krishna, then hanker that you one day hanker for Krishna. If you can’t hanker for that then hanker that one day you can hanker to hanker for Krishna.”

For five minutes he went on and on until the point was clear: We have to start from somewhere.